All Topics / Help Needed! / loss of friends

Viewing 9 posts - 41 through 49 (of 49 total)
  • Profile photo of BronBron
    Participant
    @bron
    Join Date: 2004
    Post Count: 62

    Sorry to hear about the loss of your friend, Huey.It’s always a tragedy when a person decides to take their own life. Those closest always spend time agonizing over what they could have done differently, but really, most of the time, there’s really very little. It’s so hard for those left behind who now have so many questions and little opportunity to find answers. Please don’t be too hard on yourself. Sounds like his partner and kids will be needing some extra TLC. Maybe that could be a way to find some meaning in all of this.

    Be kind to yourself
    Bron

    Profile photo of HueyHuey
    Participant
    @huey
    Join Date: 2003
    Post Count: 213

    Thanks Bron, we’ve been doing whatever we can for his family since. The shock has made us to re-assess our priorities in life. It’s a good lesson for us.

    Regards

    Huey

    Profile photo of BronBron
    Participant
    @bron
    Join Date: 2004
    Post Count: 62

    All the best Huey

    Regards
    Bron

    Profile photo of wrappackwrappack
    Member
    @wrappack
    Join Date: 2003
    Post Count: 182

    Sorry to hear of your loss, Huey. Please realise this-
    i) Very few people can understand the grief and sadness of the friends and relatives in these abominable circumstances.
    ii) Most people live in a very sheltered world where these (and other unpleasant) things are both unseen and un-thought of. Thus, the stigma and silence, which unfortunately helps perpetuate the suffering of many.
    iii) In time you will understand and come to term with his passing, and remember the good times that you had together.
    I have reread this note of mine a few times. However, this post does not adequately reflect the depth of my feelings and sorrow for you and his loved ones.

    Profile photo of melbearmelbear
    Member
    @melbear
    Join Date: 2003
    Post Count: 2,429

    Huey, I’m so sorry to hear that.

    Do not torture yourself with what you might have done differently. I seriously doubt that you could have done anything to stop him or change his mind.[:(]

    A friend of a friend spent what turned out to be his last hours catching up with all his mates – saying good bye, but they didn’t realise it at the time.[:(]

    Cheers
    Mel

    Profile photo of HueyHuey
    Participant
    @huey
    Join Date: 2003
    Post Count: 213

    Thanks Melbear, Wrappack, Bron and others who wrote to me privately. I really appreciate the kind thoughts I have received from this forum. Just to let you know that I’m ok and I’ve learnt heaps from this sad incident. I value more what I’m having and I also see clearly the danger of investing heavily in negative geared properties. We should know our limits and never rely totally in our salary to service our debts. When serious problems arise we must step back, re-assess everything that’s important to us and work out some feasible options. We should consider seriously to sell 1 or 2 IPs even at a less profit or loss in order to reduce our commitments if that is the case. When stress compounds it can destroy us. After all money is not everything in life.

    Sorry Fitness for bringing up something with little value to your thread.

    Regards

    Huey

    Profile photo of rnatrnat
    Member
    @rnat
    Join Date: 2003
    Post Count: 6

    Fitness,

    For God’s sake…GET REAL!! Your problems maintaining existing friendships stem from the fact that you either consciously or subconsciously think that your BETTER THAN THEM.

    Kay absolutely nailed it when she gave us an insight into a part of her life. But it was just that ‘a part of her life’. Her sexuality doesn’t completely define who Kay is.

    By this I mean just because Kay is a lesbian it doesn’t mean that all her friends and associates have to be!

    Learn to accept people for who they are, just because they don’t have a bank account that matches yours it doesn’t mean that you cannot learn some deep truths about them or yourself by associating with them..’from the mouths of babes’ yeah?

    You will not form better friendships because you are wealthy.Friendships form when we have things in common with people.

    Friendships last when we depend on eachother for help, advice, success or happiness.The bonds of friendship are strong when they are based on such foundations.

    Your plans need not define who you are completely..I’m sure there must be other facets to your character. You like to laugh dont you? Perhaps these friends make you laugh and perhaps they might need YOU for advice and guidance?

    All I’m saying is focus on the things you have in common not the differences. Yes we all change somewhat through life but the fact that I invest in property doesn’t define me completely..it’s just something I do.

    IT SHOULDN’T BE ALL THERE IS TO YOU OR YOUR HUSBAND FITNESS..KEEP THOSE FEET PLANTED ON THE GROUND AND TRY NOT TO BE TOO INTOXICATED BY THE SMELL OF BULLSHIT THAT YOUR SUCCESS IS GENERATING FOR YOU.

    Cheers & Good Luck

    RNAT.

    Profile photo of KenshinKenshin
    Member
    @kenshin
    Join Date: 2003
    Post Count: 36

    For myself, I had to sit down in front of my computer and allocate my time for work, studies, and fun..
    For myself i have many friends (not bragging) though only a few true friends.. who i know would die for me if it ever came up.. and I thank God for them because so many times they have saved my life..and I would do the same. So it took me a while but i figured out the time I could spend them while doing something we enjoyed..as I have plenty of hobbies and restricted time. For example I play tennis once a week with my best friend.. and my other close friends we go to the gym.. and on occassions we go out to drink and chat. I had to give up some hobbies with friends who werent so close as I felt my time should be spent with the close ones I do have. I’m happy with my mates in general, they all have being good to me and I have being to them, only time I have lost friends was the lack and common interest we shared nothin more, nothin to do with finances, maybe more to do with gals [:p].
    My friends dont have an interest in PI as I do, fair enough i dont bore them with my knowledge or theories.. and same goes with their degrees or jobs. We go out and have fun together, because we share that common interest.. that connection as good friends.. we enjoy each other company. Im not in a stage yet to tell em i have PI as I have none, though when the time does arise.. i know they would be happy with my success and if they were interested in PI, for sure I will help them out as much as I can!

    Thats IMO anyhows [:)]

    What I learnt yesterday, I know better for tommorrow – Dean

    Profile photo of 1Winner1Winner
    Participant
    @1winner
    Join Date: 2004
    Post Count: 477

    Wow, so many responses…
    This is certainly a topic people feel hitting close to home.

    We lose friends for a number of different reasons but the main one is our own change.

    We are what we think.

    In order to change and prosper we must think different.
    Such change does not go unnoticed if we are even remotely honest.

    Don’t expect to keep the friends that you chose or that chose you, when your idea of things in common was to organise a strike because your employer did not provide you with coffee, or when your topic of conversation with your friends was, the shock and horror at the news that the evil owner of Tip Top made millions by increasing the price of bread.

    We attract like-minded people. When we change our mind, we change the people we attract.
    Some friends will remain close even through big changes only because they are likeminded in the areas we have not changed.

    If you expect big changes in your results, expect big changes in yourself. Such change will inevitably mean that many people will stop liking you, not because you have turned into a monster (I would hope not anyway), but because in most people minds, prosperity is a synonym of evil.

    “Rich is evil, poor is virtuous” is preached on radio TV news papers and even in churches daily, (poverty gospel), some do not shake this off ever, even after becoming financially well off. Such people live a contradiction, feel they have to hide their financial success and are ad odds with their (imposed) belief system. Only few are able to tune into the positive side of life, and reprogram their subconscious and even re-interpret the bible (if they are Christians) for what it is, a prosperous book.

    It is those limiting beliefs that hold people from succeeding.
    Do not let that be you.

    Be glad if you change for the better, you should also notice, not only that some old friends speak now a different language you no longer want to hear, but that you no longer want to watch the news nor read most of the paper, that you cut negative conversations short grasping for air … It is a different journey, that is for sure!

    May God bless you
    and prosper you.
    Marc

Viewing 9 posts - 41 through 49 (of 49 total)

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