DejParticipant@2Join Date: 2007Post Count: 14
I have been to 3 weddings in the last year all costing $30,000 each. The couples are all young, 2 with high mortgages and 1 saving for a deposit, most of the debt paid for by credit. They all drive modern cars but paying for it on credit. Even if they had weddings for $10000, $20000 would go a long way on the mortgage.
I recently went to a 70th with 50 people attending, total cost $2000 paid for in cash. Great food and lots of fun. How do we get through to people to stop wasting money on bad debt. No doubt they'll learn the hard way when they have kids and can't afford to pay off their debts, and mum can't stay at home for more than 6 months as she has to work.
I agree with you totally. Im only young myself (I think so anyway at 28) and my wife is 27. We upset a few family members as we only had 130-140 people at our wedding and they insisted we should be inviting atleast another 50, people I had never met before. All up our wedding was around $10-$15k. But we found it much more important to save for our 1st home. Like you say just by reducing there wedding from 30k to a more realistic figure would benefit them so much in the long run.
My sister inlaw is only 25 and is now looking at needing to return to work after her child hits the age of one. I can understand that families need the income etc but when they have just spent close to $40K on a new Honda family car it puzzles me a little. Ah well its there money I guess. Like you say, they will learn the hard way. Our family thinks we are having some problems somewhere as we have been married for 5 yrs and still dont have kids. They dont understand that we are paying off our PPOR and have an IP and are TRYING to get enough money in the bank for my wife to stay at home a little while when we do have a kid ( and enough money for me to try and convince my wife another Ip would be nice, lol) . Who knows, our way may be wrong but it seems to be going ok for us so far. Each to there own I guess.
Jayro.DejParticipant@2Join Date: 2007Post Count: 14
Your setting a great example for the young to follow, maybe if they see some real life examples some couples may see the light and follow suit. Its great your wife agrees with you, keep it up.DraconisVParticipant@draconisvJoin Date: 2006Post Count: 319
I agree totally with what everyone is saying, my sister is going to get married janurary 2008(shes been engaged for 2 years), and well my parents said they would pay 15K, her fiances parents are paying 5K, so thats 20K that they dont have to fork out, but they still are forking out an extra 26K aswell. This is unreasonable 46K for a wedding, come on they bought their house with little deposit, cashflow would be tight and they do this.
I've already had a chat with my girlfriend, we're on the same page, decent wedding, not extravagant.
Chris.L.A AussieMember@l.a-aussieJoin Date: 2006Post Count: 1,488
Our wedding cost $6k – I paid for the whole thing as my and her parents are broke, and my wife was studying nursing at the time and earned little.
We only invited 80 people, it was a great day.
Our mindset was to pay off the PPoR; not waste it on one day that no-one else really remembers anyway other than us.sizzling_duckMember@sizzling_duckJoin Date: 2004Post Count: 129
My wedding 2 years this month (part of the reason I haven't been here for so long…) cost 6-7k. 60-odd guests and the ceremony was held as a historic house in Brisbane (Newstead). While the reception was held nearby and the guests were served danishes and fruits while waiting for our photos to be taken and then had really great foods served for brunch (yes that means a 8am wedding on a Sunday). Great day and no overexpensive wastage on hangers-on to the wedding industry.
$120 mudcake eligantly designed that was 40cm x 40cm not $300 for a circle of white icing! The wife arrived in a Rolls Royce even!
Thanks Anny, and your right it is great to have an understanding wife. She is wanting to start a family soon so she is holding back a little on the push for the 2nd IP. She certainly wants more but is thinking either now or after she returns to work full time where as im more TRYING to get the 2nd IP in before she falls pregnant, lol. Either way im sure things will work our I guess. It is a bit nerve racking getting into large debt with the thought of being on one wage but at the end of the day either way we are confident that we have the right things in place to help us. I hope so anyway, lol
Im still lost for words a little over Chris' sister. Geeze, $46k. PLEASE tell me that includes a honeymoon in there somewhere atleast??? Mate at least you and your Girlfriend are on the same level. Thats the important part. Others make there own choices I guess. I know my brother who married a very nice Italian girl was expected to spend 1/3 of his annual salary on the engagment ring as it was "the way its done" and my family also an Italian back ground so he did what was expected. Not my way of spending hard earned dollars but hey whatever floats ya boat I guess.
JayroDraconisVParticipant@draconisvJoin Date: 2006Post Count: 319Jayro wrote:I'm still lost for words a little over Chris' sister. Geeze, $46k. PLEASE tell me that includes a honeymoon in there somewhere atleast??? Mate at least you and your Girlfriend are on the same level. Thats the important part.
Umm, I don't know if there is a honeymoon in there, but they are going away to the gold coast for 3 weeks, with i think helicopter rides and everything.
Have a big honeymoon:The exciting way to get into debt.
Chris.MillyMember@millyJoin Date: 2004Post Count: 288
…….and seven years later they get divorcedL.A AussieMember@l.a-aussieJoin Date: 2006Post Count: 1,488Milly wrote:…….and seven years later they get divorced
I hope thems not the words of someone bitter and twisted?devo76Member@devo76Join Date: 2007Post Count: 542
Our weddong cost $20,000. Its the biggest moment in many young girls lives. I was happy to spend that on my wife.Im all for saving for your future but fair go. If you be too much of a cheap bastard you will be sitting in you mansion rich and ALONE becouse no one wants to live with a tight arse. Just my thoughts.
I understand what you are saying. But like all things in life mate I think there needs to be a happy medium, thats all im saying. If $20k was what you as a couple thought was right then thats all that matters in the long run.
Jayroseer76Member@seer76Join Date: 2007Post Count: 23
Ok….I totally agree…tooooooo much money is spent on just ONE day!!! My huband and I married 7 years ago (at age 24), on the beach infront in front of 25 people who we love and still see to this day! We spent a grand total of $3000 and to this day I still have those that attended say that it was the 'most beautiful wedding' that they have been to. You really do not have to spend that much and go into mountains of debt, that is a choice we made…we also did not want to put that financial pressure on our parents to provide us with a BIG wedding. Now all these years later, we have 3 beautiful boys and 4 investment properties too…..no lingering fairytale debt thank god!!!!
Heres to prosperity now and in the future….
Seer76.WylieMember@wylieJoin Date: 2004Post Count: 346
We have been married 21 years and would both have preferred to do a low key quiet wedding, even registry office and a nice restaurant after. Our nephew has just done that, and it was a lovely day and I reckon pretty inexpensive. I am an only daughter so really did the big wedding for my mother's sake. I was uncomfortable being in the spotlight all day and couldn't wait for it to be over.
We both felt the same way, but we gritted our teeth and got though the day. We are really happy and how we felt about our wedding day is no reflection on how we feel about being married. It is just that we are low key types and were both wanting it to be over so we could relax.
Anyway, it was paid for by my parents and the alcohol by hubby's parents. These days many weddings seem to be organised and paid for by the couple, and that gives them much more control over things. (The day was much more important to my mother than to me, so I am happy she got the wedding she would have liked for herself.)
I have three boys and they saw how lovely the simple ceremony was we went to recently. I really hope they meet sensible girls who don't want to go overboard for one day. I have a little plan in my head to offer them the money we would put towards a wedding to put towards a house instead of a big splashy wedding.
Wylie I love the idea of the money going towards your kids first home instead of the wedding. My mother in-law charged my now wife board while she lived at home and gave her back the money when we got married as a present to go to the wedding costs. However if we were encouraged to have a smaller wedding and put the $$$ towards the house it would have been far better spent. Great Idea Wylie.
Jayro!small_timeMember@small_timeJoin Date: 2007Post Count: 8
I am getting married in 2 weeks time. Nothing too extravagent, and luckily our parents are paying for most of it. That said, budget really didn't come into it, we decided what we wanted and have done it., but we are both happy with small things so costs weren't massive anyway and nothing has been paid on credit. We had to pay for the honeymoon ourselves, but have each been putting money away each pay since we got engaged to cover that.
In the end though, it is a really big day in most young womens lives, so money can't be the primary concern…
Now as for people buying new cars all the time…don't get me started!Stella1258Member@stella1258Join Date: 2007Post Count: 45
My son who lives in Sydney (27) was married 2 yrs ago to a lovely Maltese girl (23). Her parents gave them $20k & refused to take any contribution from us (although we did at least convince them to let us pay for suit hire for all the men & gave them cash a wedding present).
The couple were told to spend as much as they wanted of the $20k but anything they didnt spend would be theirs to keep. They organised a fantastic wedding for 140 people but still managed to keep something just over $10k to go towards their deposit. They had a weekend away but waited 3 months for their 'real' honeymoon of 2 weeks in Fiji which they paid cash for.
It was great to see them come out of it without a huge debt and they purchased their PPOR just short of their first wedding anniversary.brookeleaParticipant@brookeleaJoin Date: 2007Post Count: 52
i went to my nephew's baptism on saturday, the cost of the reception per head – $150
i had home bbq's for my childrenskkingMember@kkingJoin Date: 2006Post Count: 17
Unfortunately too many young couples speed more time planning the wedding than they do the marriage.