shopping tips

Subject: FW: Shopping tips
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> How to alleviate boredom at Big W while your significant other is taking
his
> or her sweet time:
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> 1. Get 24 boxes of condoms & randomly put them in peoples carts when they
> aren’t looking.
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> 2. Set all the alarm clocks in Homewares to go off at 5 minute intervals.
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> 3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
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> 4. Walk up to an employee and tell them in an official tone, ‘Code 3’ in
> Homewares . . . and see what happens.
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> 5. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M & M’s on lay buy.
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> 6. Move a ‘CAUTION – WET FLOOR’ sign to a carpeted area.
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> 7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you’ll
> invite them in if they bring pillows from the bedding department.
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> 8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, “Why
can’t
> you people just leave me alone?”
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> 9. Look right into the security camera, use it as a mirror and pick your
> nose.
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> 10. Dart around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the theme from
> “Mission Impossible.”
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> 11. In the auto department, practice your “Madonna look” using different
> size funnels.
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> 12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say “PICK ME,
> PICK ME!”
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> 13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the Fetal
> position and scream “NO! NO! It’s those voices again!!!” And last but not
> least:
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> 14. Go into a fitting room, shut the door and wait a while and then yell
> loudly, “There’s no toilet paper in here!”
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