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  • Profile photo of muppetmuppet
    Member
    @muppet
    Join Date: 2003
    Post Count: 900

    Hi Guys
    Which system would you like?

    TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM:
    You have two cows.
    You sell one and buy a bull.
    Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.
    You sell them and retire on the income.

    AMERICAN CAPITALISM:You have two cows.
    You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened
    by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an
    associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption
    for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary
    to a Cayman Island company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the
    rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the
    company owns eight cows, with option on one more. Sell one cow to buy a new
    president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet
    provided with the release. The public buy your bull.

    AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION:You have two cows.
    You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You are
    surprised when the cow drops dead.

    A FRENCH CORPORATION:
    You have two cows.
    You go on strike because you want three cows.

    A JAPANESE CORPORATION:
    You have two cows.
    You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty
    times the milk. You then create clever cow cartoon images called Cowkimon and market
    them worldwide.

    A GERMAN CORPORATION:
    You have two cows.
    You reengineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.

    A BRITISH CORPORATION:
    You have two cows.
    Both are mad.

    AN ITALIAN CORPORATION:
    You have two cows, but you don’t know where they are.
    You break for lunch.

    A RUSSIAN CORPORATION:
    You have two cows.
    You count them and learn you have five cows.
    You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
    You count them again and learn you have 12 cows.
    You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.

    A SWISS CORPORATION:
    You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you.
    You charge others for storing them.

    A CHINESE CORPORATION:
    You have two cows.
    You have 300 people milking them.
    You claim full employment, high bovine productivity and arrest the
    newsman who reported the numbers.

    A NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION:You have two cows.
    That one on the left is kinda cute.

    Regards

    Profile photo of melbearmelbear
    Member
    @melbear
    Join Date: 2003
    Post Count: 2,429

    [:)]Muppet.

    I thought that it was sheep though[:X]

    Cheers
    Mel

    Profile photo of JetDollarsJetDollars
    Participant
    @jetdollars
    Join Date: 2003
    Post Count: 2,435

    COL

    one more for you.

    Cambodia Corporation:
    You have two cows.
    You kill one to eat today and keep one for tomorrow. You starve to dead the day after tomorrow.

    Warm Regards

    ChanDollars
    [Keep going, you’re on your way to financial freedom]

    Profile photo of Matt PMatt P
    Member
    @matt-p
    Join Date: 2003
    Post Count: 645

    rofl… well dome muppet, very funny [:D]

    Cheers Matt

    “If you do what you have always done, you will get what you have always had.”

    “Isn’t it time for a change?”

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